Welcome to Come On Over, a Food52 newsletter about hosting life’s big and little moments. It’s where we share our personal tips and tricks, from modern-day etiquette—shoes off or shoes on?—to making extra seating out of every surface of an apartment. This week, Kelly’s breaking the ice.
There’s nothing I love more than introducing one group of friends to another, especially when I know they’re going to get along swimmingly. But walking into a room full of unfamiliar faces can be awkward, even in the friendliest setting. And when you’re the one bringing everyone together, it’s on you to smooth that tension. So I gathered a few go-to tricks from the Food52 team.
1. No Interrogation Lamps
Think about it: Harsh overhead lighting only makes those early awkward moments feel even more intense. Alexis says to ditch the formal sit-down dinner so people can move around and mingle naturally. Keep food and drinks easy to grab, and soften the lighting wherever you can. As she puts it: “The number one thing to improve a space… dimmers.”
2. Music, The Great Communicator
Jillian notes that making sure there’s upbeat music is important to making people feel comfortable—no mournful tunes, please and thanks. Take it a step further and have music videos playing on the TV. Nothing brings people closer than bonding over Panic! at the Disco.
3. Intentional Intros
It might sound obvious, but it’s often so obvious that hosts forget. As guests arrive, Alex reminds hosts to be intentional about introducing people to one another. “Share how you know each other and maybe even throw in a detail about what they might have in common. Hosting means more than just organizing a pretty party!”
4. Game the System
The fastest way to get people vibing is to get them gaming. Start with something classic like two truths and a lie. And Jackbox party games are another way to include a ton of people at once. It’s low effort, high payoff, and everyone can join in right from their phones.
5. Bring the Chatterbox
Got a friend who’s never met an awkward silence? Make sure they’re at the top of the guest list—and have them arrive a little early. If you’re doing assigned seating, put them smack in the middle to help bridge groups. As Julia puts it (à la Curb Your Enthusiasm), your “middler” should be the strongest conversationalist with the best stories to tell.
6. Be Prepared
As the host, be ready to jump in and smooth over any lulls with a tailored conversation starter. If you already know what your guests have in common—great. If not, throw out one of these: celebrity encounters or their Kevin Bacon number from Beyoncé, their most cancellable food take, or how they’d describe themselves as a charcuterie board ingredient.
What are your best tips for breaking the ice around a dinner table?
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